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Schlong Salad: AKA Crown Roast of Frankfurters

A serving of Schlong Salad

A serving of Schlong Salad

Prefer your Sunday family dinner with phallic overtones? Then the Crown Roast of Frankfurters/Schlong Salad is for you.

Ingredients:

1 pound frankfurters

2 tablespoons cider vinegar

1 teaspoon poppy seeds

2 cups shredded cabbage

1/2 cup boiling water

Pimento

Method:

Slice frankfurters lengthwise, but do not cut all the way through. (Do not separate halves.) Open. Broil, cut sides up, on rack about 3 inches from source of heat, about 5 minutes. Add vinegar and poppy seeds to cabbage; toss thoroughly. Heap cabbage in a mound in center of a baking dish. Lean cut side of frankfurters against cabbage to form a crown. Secure franfurters with toothpicks. Pour water over cabbage. Bake at 350° (moderate oven) 10 minutes, or until cabbage is tender but still crisp.

Serve your plate of dicks with pimento as garnish. Relish the horrified stares of your dinner guests.