Ninja Article Storage

LFB: Checkout Chick Bondage

Lady Fluffy Beaver's Advice.jpg

Dear Lady Fluffy Beaver

I have a delicate question but I think you can answer it for me. I’ve read a lot of novels involving whips and chains, you know the ones. Let’s just say Fifty Shades of Grey is on my bedside table and I read it like an oracle. So, my problem is this... I don’t even like getting paper cuts but reading about being spanked turns me on. How do I enjoy the kind of stuff I read about in my favorite naughty novels without actually having my very own Christian Grey get out the paddles?

Yours Sincerely

Spank me Softly

Dear Spank

We beavers can completely relate to your problem. Personally, when I’m nibbling and gnawing on a nice big length of wood, the last thing I want is for it to fall on my head. I want the enjoyment without the concussion. BUT, I sometimes have incredibly graphic fluffy dreams about a giant round, long, long, hunk of wood hanging over me. Ohh, my teeth are twanging at the thought... hmm... Anyway, I digress. The solution to your problem is to find things that are painful that don’t involve pain. Think about the things you may say “Oh my God, that’s such a pain in the arse” and then apply them to your bedroom activities. An example would be, have your own personal Mr Grey get you all ball gagged up and then grab fifty tins of canned food of the same kind and pretend to put them through a checkout scanner at snail speed. Painful, right? Sexy? Well, if he’s naked it might be.

Yours in Fluffiness

LFB